Psychotherapist's advice on how not to think about the bad. Stop thinking about the bad and learn to direct your thoughts in the right direction
Do you often think bad things? Stop doing it!
The situation when life loses its bright colors and plunges into the path of anxious expectations can take any of us by surprise. But this does not mean at all that everything gloomy and sad, drawn by the imagination, should become a reality.
And since such thoughts are inspired only by the imagination of a person and there are no prerequisites for anxiety, then it’s not worth poisoning your existence! You just need to learn how to cope with such a mood, tune in a positive way and start living calmly.
Only those who know how to cope with negative thoughts and feelings succeed in living, enjoying every moment given by fate.
There are several ways how to stop thinking bad things.
- Take control of your desires and emotions
It's just not easy to overcome your feelings. True, there are a number of ways to redirect your attention in a more positive direction and relieve stress.
If you have made the decision to stop thinking about the bad, then the first thing you have to do is find arguments to make sure that the situation is not as bad as it might seem at first.
In this case, you will have to mobilize common sense and the ability to think logically, which will help convince yourself of the meaninglessness of experiences and the ability to keep the situation under control.
As soon as you manage to rely on convincing arguments confirming that everything is not so bad and you can fully count on a positive completion of the case, then the experiences will melt like snow with the advent of spring.
And do not think that it is too difficult to arm yourself with such arguments. To achieve what you want, all you need is to pull yourself together and calm down, looking at the current situation from the outside.
And if it is not always possible to find arguments, then it is also not worth worrying ahead of time. Why kill yourself first? Moreover, fate can still deflect the blow.
And yet, a prudent person will always weigh all possible options and think over ways of retreat, if suddenly events go in the wrong direction, which is necessary.
- Physical exercise
Simple physical exercises will also help to stop thinking about the bad. For example: a panic attack and unreasonable fear can be negated by the most ordinary squats. 15 or 20 will be enough.
But at the time of such an attack of negative emotions, a person may be in a public place where squats will look somehow strange.
In such a case, you can get by with a quick clenching and unclenching of the fingers into fists. When appropriate, pull-ups, push-ups, and other exercises can help you stop thinking about the negative. Under the influence of physical activity, the body will cope with panic and bad mood in a matter of moments.
Water procedures can also be attributed to the category of life-saving remedies that help stop thinking about the bad. Often it is possible to throw off the negativity with ordinary washing. Moreover, there are practically no obstacles to repeating such a procedure. Although washing with ice water is not entirely pleasant, such an action will sober anyone.
- Water procedures
But if something does not work out with washing, then this process can be replaced by wiping the face, prudently moistened with a handkerchief. Washing of this kind should be addressed even at the most critical moments, which are almost impossible to deal with in other ways.
A contrast shower is even more effective. But this method of dealing with "thoughts" about the bad can be limited by specific conditions.
In order to withstand all the trials that fate sends, it is extremely important for a person to learn how to control his own consciousness. Possessing such skills, each of us will be able to adequately overcome all the difficulties that are encountered in life.
Feelings and sensations of the present moment depend on the ability to control oneself. But the most important thing is that the ability to concentrate the will and direct thoughts in the right direction has a positive effect on your future, which can be hopelessly spoiled by chronic experiences and nervous breakdowns.
Stop thinking about the bad - live consciously, think only about the good - and everything will be tip-top!
Bright thoughts to you!
Artur Golovin
P.S. What are you doing to stop thinking about the bad?
Interesting on the topic:
Every person is affected by bad thoughts. They arise as a result of unjustified hopes, difficulties at work and similar life adversities. Negative thoughts quickly eat a person from the inside and drive him into a prolonged depression. If you do not take action in time, there is a risk of losing yourself forever. Ultimately, a person ceases to enjoy life.
Method number 1. Analyze negative emotions
When difficult life circumstances arise, many people do their best to hide them, do not betray them due importance. Often this opinion is considered erroneous. If you keep all the accumulated negativity in yourself, sooner or later complete despair sets in. In this case, it is worth analyzing the pressing problems and trying to cope with them as soon as possible.
- Control your thoughts. Set aside time to read psychological books aimed at expanding the subconscious mind. Fight negative thinking, try to extract positive emotions from what happened. Think positive, dream, no matter what. Human thoughts are material and have a pleasant feature to come true. The choice is yours - what to do, good or bad. By gaining control over your mind, you will no longer allow bad thoughts to control you.
- Find inspiration. In critical situations, a person despairs so much that he does not see a way out. Negativity literally breaks it, making it weak-willed. Believe me, there is always a way! Remember the bright moments in your life when you were happy. Inspiration is the key to trouble. Think about how much you haven't done yet and where you haven't been. Get the best of bad thoughts, don't let yourself fade away. Do what you have been dreaming of for a long time.
- Let emotions out. Most often, despondency comes with the departure of a loved one, a quarrel with relatives or friends, difficulties at work. Try to spit out the negative at one time. Remember pleasant and funny stories, give vent to emotions and let go of evil. The past cannot be returned, they quarreled, which means that you will soon make up. And at work, everything is normal, and the money will be. Be strong, live in the present, because life is beautiful. Feel free to cry sometimes, in this way you unload the nervous system and clear your mind.
Method number 2. Don't lock yourself in
Communicate. During the experience of difficult life moments, you should not close yourself in, protect yourself from friends and relatives. In critical situations, contact a psychologist, state the problems and let them go. Do not blame yourself for what happened, look for alternative actions to deal with bad thoughts. Do not isolate yourself from the outside world, communication with new people will quickly correct your perception of life.
- Look for allies. If possible, find purposeful and positive interlocutors. Such a move will help develop your ego. Negative thoughts will recede into the background. Having found a new social circle, become an interesting conversationalist. Express your opinion, offer non-standard ideas, do not be shy of emotions. Be more interested in the field of activity that affects you, share your personal observations and experiences.
- Provide support to family members. Based on your personal experience of experienced difficulties, be able to listen to a loved one. Talking about his current problems will help you forget the bad moments from your own life. Do more good deeds, help sick family members, take care, cook, buy medicines. Arrange warm evenings in a friendly company, communicate more on diverse topics.
- Become a volunteer. Do noble deeds, look at people with disabilities. You will realize how insignificant your problems look against their background. After what you see comes the realization that absolutely everything is within your power. Working in this area, people make interesting acquaintances and gain life experience from each other.
- Pay attention to the little things. Go for a walk around the city on your day off. Concentrate on the little things, pay attention to the birds. Look around the buildings in the city center, you may have never noticed such exciting architecture. Relax, take a long walk like a first-time tourist in your city. Concentration on external factors helps the brain to work at a new level, overshadowing existing problems.
- Rejoice in the present. With the advent of negative emotions, a person moves away from friends and closes in on himself. He thinks that left alone with the problem, he can deal with it much faster. Such an opinion is a gross mistake. If friends invited you to visit or to entertainment events, do not hesitate and agree. Every time you go out for a walk, you can meet interesting people and get a lot of positive emotions. A person quickly withers away without society and a sense of his social significance.
Method number 3. Become a confident person
The reasons for bad thoughts can be different. If we are talking about problems related to work, financial difficulties or personal life, it will not be difficult to correct the situation. First of all, don't take it all on yourself. Both bad and good periods come in life, be prepared for anything.
- Work on yourself. Decide which area you work best in. Take workshops and refresher courses. Get a job in a new organization that will rightfully appreciate you. Improve, gradually discovering new skills in yourself.
- Develop your personality. Expand your mind with useful literature. Read history, psychology, sociology. If possible, start learning a foreign language, do it yourself with the help of audio lessons and your favorite movies. This method will allow you to learn unfamiliar phrases much faster than daily memorization of a textbook or dictionary.
- Do not depend on the opinion of society. Be natural when you are around familiar faces. You should not constantly pick up smart phrases, watch your hair and clothes. Do not refuse to laugh heartily, be yourself. People will love you for your openness and simplicity of character. Those who don't like you will drop out over time. Spit on imaginary friends, they are not worthy of you.
- Develop physically. Sports and morning jogging have never harmed anyone. Physical activity has a positive effect on the general psycho-emotional background. Do the exercises conscientiously, the result will not keep you waiting. Soon you will realize how self-confident you have become and forget about past failures. Give up bad habits. Follow a sleep schedule and a proper diet.
Throw away thoughts about the past, you can’t return to it. Live for today, develop, communicate, do not hold back feelings and emotions. Find real friends, spit on those who left you. Become the person they will look up to and not be afraid to seek advice. You decide your own destiny!
Video: how to get rid of negative thoughts
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The influence of thoughts on reality or how to learn to think about what you want and stop thinking about the bad?
Think about what you want and don't think about what you don't want, then dreams will come true.
Everything is correct.
And many of you have heard these words repeatedly.
But how can this principle be applied in practice?
How not to think about the bad?
And how to learn to think only about what you want to see in your life?
Attention! You have probably heard that thoughts shape our reality. With the power of thought, you can change the present, the future, and sometimes the past.
I decided to devote today's article to examples from our everyday life, so that in these scenes you see yourself and understand how to learn to think only about what you want.
The influence of thoughts on human life
The influence of thoughts on human life is simply enormous.
In fact, our every thought creates reality.
To learn more about how our thoughts affect our lives, see the video
And if we see how the same negative circumstances come into our lives again and again, it means that we attract them ourselves, thinking about them day after day.
The influence of negative thoughts can be easily seen in the appearance of undesirable circumstances that upset you.
Pay special attention to those circumstances that happen again and again, like a broken record. The repetition of the same event clearly indicates that you have a lot of negative thoughts about this and you think them often.
I will give an example of the influence of thoughts on relationships.
Suppose a person once again fails in a love relationship.
He breaks up with a man he dated for a short time. And he has almost a dozen such relationships, lasting for a couple of months.
The very situation of the gap is a very unpleasant event for this person. He doesn't want that.
He ideally dreams of a good partner and a long, strong relationship.
But let's see what thoughts led him to break up again.
Immediately after the breakup, there is a reaction that in itself leads to a repetition of the same thing in the future:
I can't build normal relationships. I am forever alone. Not a single person suits me, everyone needs something, and I don’t understand what it is. What do they all need?
It was still good, love, why does a person begin to behave in an incomprehensible way? Why build something out of yourself? Every time the same thing, it is impossible to find a normal person.
I can't build relationships. I find it easier to be alone.
And then the Universe, shrugging its shoulders, answers, “Well, so be it!”
How to stop thinking about the bad?
How to get out of the vicious cycle of repetitive events?
First, you need to change the reaction.
Secondly, change your thoughts to those that you want to see in your life.
Knowing about the power of thought and the influence of thoughts on life, a person must, by an effort of will, respond correctly, without negativity, for example, like this:
It didn't work this time, it will work next time. So my destiny is another person. So, there is my soulmate and soon I will meet her.
My next love will be more successful. I would like my loved one to understand and support me, and it would be easy and simple to communicate with him.
And at the same time, do not mentally wash the bones of the former partner and do not recount all his negative aspects of character. Do not remember how horribly he acted and how ugly he reacted ...
These thoughts should be discarded and start thinking about the good qualities of a future partner. That is, to think about what is not yet. And do it on purpose to make it appear.
Changing thoughts!
This is done at first by an effort of will. If you are used to letting your mind go free, then in order to fulfill your desires and get what you want in your life, you need to tame it.
Your mind must work for you.
Mind, thoughts - build your world, shape your reality.
Where there is thought, there is reality.
If you want to choose for yourself what will happen in your reality, then you need to direct your thoughts in the right direction by an effort of will.
This is the only way to get out of the vicious circle of recurring negative events.
First: a positive reaction. Second: thoughts about what I would like to have ideally.
The influence of thoughts on family relationships
The next example of the influence of thoughts on relationships I want to dedicate to people who are already in strong relationships.
Often we get angry at our soul mates or think that our partner is very bad at something.
In the head of a married lady ironing her husband's shirts on Sunday lunch, one can hear the following thoughts:
He again yesterday did not nail this shelf. He is an absolute lazy person, he can't do anything. How tired I am of always reminding him. Why did I get such a husband? And these shirts can be thrown out a month after purchase. How can you treat things like that. Comes and throws on the floor. Slut!
As we can see, this is a standard “complaint” about life, which we often hear in our heads ourselves.
Who is complaining.
But the gist is the same: we think about what we DO NOT want to see in our lives.
How not to think about the bad?
Just remember that your every daily thought should be ABOUT WHAT YOU WANT.
And then the thoughts of this lady should change to these:
My husband, of course, is not perfect, but in general he is very caring.
I love it so much when he cooks dinner himself sometimes.
I also like how carefully he drives the car. He provides us and it is worth appreciating. In general, if you look at it, my husband is real gold.
And so, the more positive a woman finds in her husband, the more good qualities will appear in him.
And you can not only look for the positive, you can shape it.
For example:
My husband is very careful with his clothes and he has enough shirts for a whole year.
Let it not be so now. But when did that stop a real wizard?
We create our own reality.
We are able to create something that has not yet been.
We are able to manifest another sector of reality. Another variant.
And if you're ready to start the change - join my
How our thoughts affect the body
Our thoughts affect our body in a direct way.
I have noticed from my own experience that if you constantly think that an extra dessert will have a bad effect on the figure, then it will be so.
You will get fat not by the day, but by the hour.
And all these standard thoughts will be to blame.
But you can think differently...
The French, whose culture is quite supportive of wine, smoking, cakes (solid saxap!) and spicy sauces (solid cholesterol!), consume all this and live to a ripe old age, remaining healthy and slim.
A lot of research has been done in an attempt to understand their “secret”, because, according to modern theories, a person needs to have a coronary bypass surgery after almost every visit to the candy store.
However, there is no secret. It's all about the mood. The French eat with pleasure and without guilt.
You can make it a rule for yourself: every time you eat something sweet, say to yourself:
I am getting slimmer and prettier every day.
I can eat whatever I want, I'm still slimmer.
I have a very fast metabolism.
A heavy dinner is digested very quickly and goes to building muscles.
Everything depends on you.
Get out of your head all those thoughts and opinions that society inspires you.
Think only about what you want. You are entitled to it.
If you want to have a beautiful body, say so to yourself, looking in the mirror:
I have a gorgeous beautiful body.
Let at first it will seem to you that this is a cruel lie.
After some time, reality will change, and you will see in the mirror what you thought about daily.
The influence of thoughts on fate
What do you think about your destiny?
Listen, whatever you think of her, she will be as you imagine her in your thoughts.
Are you afraid to repeat the fate of your older relatives? As long as you are afraid, you choose the negative option.
To be afraid to get = to think about what you do NOT want.
My father was an alcoholic, so I have these genes. I can become like that too... I don't want to. I'm scared.
These thoughts are very dangerous, if this happened to you, replace them with new ones:
I have good genes. My father was very smart, read a lot, despite his problem, was a respected person.
I will take only his most positive qualities, and my fate will be beautiful.
There is only one way to overcome a negative scenario: stop thinking about it, and start thinking about a new desired scenario.
Replace unwanted thoughts with desirable ones.
How to do it? How not to think about the bad?
If you know for sure that your bad negative thoughts affect your life, you will never be able to calmly think about the bad “for your pleasure”.
We are used to thinking about the bad, we do it out of habit. Because everyone around them thinks it's normal. Complaining, making claims, being afraid, judging in your mind - all this is the norm.
No one has told us since childhood how this adversely affects our lives.
Materials are just beginning to appear, articles are being published, articles are being written, videos are being shot that you need to think only about what you want.
Today, today, look at what is “bad” in your life.
Remember all the thoughts that often visit your head regarding this "bad". Become aware of these negative thoughts. Start recognizing them as they pop into your head.
Come up with new replacement thoughts.
Think only about what you want.
Hello dear readers! The expectation of something bad and inevitable worries and destroys our psyche much longer and stronger than this incident itself. We can wait for years for a betrayal from a loved one or a dismissal, and when this finally happens, we do not exhale, but begin to worry even more. This process only takes a maximum of a month. Then life continues to go on as usual.
To the question of how not to think about the bad, psychology gives many answers and recommendations. It is about them that we will talk today. I will suggest you some useful books, give you some recommendations, and in the end, I hope you will learn how to relax psychologically.
Shall we start?
Think for a minute
Find a new hobby
Most human problems come from too much routine. In fact, you may not be so afraid of the “bad” that you constantly think about. With your thoughts, you move away from more pressing problems, the solution of which is not yet able to be found. A person needs to think, but, unfortunately, you simply have nothing to think about. There is a second option - you are afraid to think about something else.
Before entering, the girl goes headlong into a new relationship, constantly trying to catch the guy cheating. In fact, she is simply afraid to worry about the upcoming exams, she has a very big fear of not going further and “falling out of life” for a year, and therefore she is fond of the problem that does not bring her psyche much harm.
If you force yourself to get carried away with something, then it will be much more useful. For example, try a healthy diet, learn as much as possible about diets, sports. Finding one you like is quite difficult, but the faster you do it, or at least start doing it, the sooner your thoughts will switch.
Read
Books, like nothing else, take us away from the everyday world with their problems. I can offer you a book by Rafael Santandreu " 20 ways to get out of the captivity of toxic thoughts».
Although, frankly, it seems to me that in this situation it is not necessary to dig into your brains, try to break out of captivity or reshape your brain. Exercises, understanding, theoretical teachings - a rather difficult way of "cure". This word in itself sets up some obstacles.
You are not sick. It’s just that there are few pleasant moments in your life, you don’t know how to respond to them correctly. Start by reading positive fiction. We are what surrounds us, so add satisfaction to your life.
Take Joan Harris" Blackberry wine», « The cure for melancholy"Rhea Bradbury," Manyunya» Narine Abgaryan, Terry Pratchett « People, or once we were dolphins».
Thanks to books, it will be easier for you to control the flow of information that falls on you and burdens you with negative emotions.
Walk more
Get yourself a dog or offer your friends free dog walking services. Go to the park, go to the forest, breathe fresh air. Whatever you say, it helps a lot to get distracted. It would seem that when we walk, thoughts do not stop swarming in our head.
Nevertheless, the sun or just a pleasant new environment sets you up in a positive way. You will not be able to think about the bad, your thoughts will only be about the good. Don't like the idea of looking after someone's animal? Just take a good book and find the best place to read in nature.
OK it's all over Now. I wish you all the very best. See you again. Don't forget to subscribe to the newsletter.
Is there a negative voice inside your head that interferes with life? He criticizes, whines, complains and undermines self-confidence. He says it won't work again. The voice demands to be more modest, not to take risks and not to try anything that could change life. The negative voice scares you with different things that will never even happen. You will never get rid of your inner critic, but you can harness it and use it to your advantage.
How to stop thinking about the bad and realize yourself?
1. Misperception of mistakes
When troubles happen, problems and difficulties appear - we lose heart. When someone brings us down, betrays or strikes us, we find ourselves in a stupor. We don't understand why this happened. We get angry and play everything in our head over and over again. We think about mistakes, revenge, complain and wind ourselves up. So we spend a lot of time and energy fixing on troubles. We do not think how to solve them, but we think about misfortunes.
Time and opportunities are running out while we are mired in negative thinking. This is a misperception of errors. Mistakes should not drive you into depression. They should teach new things, help find other ways and spur to overcome difficulties.
2. Seeking justice, instead of wiggle power
It's time to come to terms with the fact that the world is unfair. It is impossible to have control over the whole world in order to establish order according to one's opinion of justice. Danila Bagrov, in the film "Brother 2", argued: "Whoever has the truth is stronger!" But it's not. Stop running around demanding truth and justice. Who is stronger is right. So you need to become stronger, and not complain about the injustice of the world.
3. You choose how you respond to problems.
When you spill coffee on your trousers, it's an accidental nuisance. You can quickly change into your trousers and go to work, forgetting this minor morning annoyance. But you can only make things worse for yourself all day long. You can yell at your friend who made you coffee. You can worry all day about your sluggishness. You can quarrel with colleagues because of a bad mood and in the morning. But you choose how you react.
All our troubles are only 20% of the case. The remaining 80% of troubles are our reaction to what is happening. You choose how you respond to all your problems.
4. Change yourself before taking new heights
We decide to start working better, get back on our feet, change jobs, go about our own business or improve our personal lives. But we make one major mistake, and then we suffer. We do not change ourselves when we want to achieve a new goal. As a result, the "old you" cannot win, but the "new you" can. We go into depression and begin to think negatively.
Does your new job require foreign language proficiency? Does a new position require new knowledge? Pretty girls peck at athletic guys who have their tongues tied up? To take new heights, you need to become better. Change yourself first, then try something more. If you fail, then you are too weak and not ready for it. Upgrade your skills.
Stop thinking about the bad, be loaded with negative thoughts and take a step forward. Realize yourself to the fullest. Unleash your potential.