How to handle stress. How to control yourself when everything is annoying
Mental balance is very important not only for the person himself, but also for his relationship with others, and sometimes for personal development. These 8 simple rules will help you learn to control yourself and remain calm in any situation.
You have to learn not to get emotional
You can respond to a negative situation either positively, or negatively, or neutrally. Whatever happens, you need to try not to succumb to surging emotions and look at things soberly. In such cases, a simple count to ten or deep breathing helps many people. Emotions need to be kept under control - this is half the battle.
You should realize that no matter what happens - life does not end there.
Just a rule that many people ignore. But once a person understands this simple truth, any situation no longer seems so depressing and gloomy. Most often, there are no hopeless situations, but people are prevented from realizing this, just the same extra emotions.
You need to learn to develop indifference in yourself
Indifference can be not only something negative. Often, it is indifferent and cold-blooded people who quickly find a way out of any situation. Here, of course, it is also important not to overdo it.
Meditation as a way to control yourself
Meditation is very beneficial for the state of mind and teaches a person peace and tranquility. For the desired effect, it is enough to give it from 10-15 minutes to half an hour daily and the result will not be long in coming.
Maintain the atmosphere in your home
Unfortunately, many people like to take it out on loved ones in order to “let off steam” and intentionally provoke scandals and petty quarrels. Such situations are detrimental not only to the one who creates them, but also to the one at whom this anger is directed. In order not to spoil relations with relatives, you need to learn to ignore minor everyday problems and appreciate more global things in life.
Hobbies to your liking as a way to maintain peace of mind
Research shows that people who have favorite hobby, much happier and more stress-resistant than those who do not have it. You can draw, embroider, burn, collect, photograph, do floriculture or art therapy - in a word, any thing that would distract a person from unnecessary thoughts. Such creative activity acts on a person as meditation, calms and promotes the release of endorphins.
Sleep in the struggle for peace of mind
"Morning is wiser than evening" - says famous proverb, and its meaning lies much deeper than it seems. Healthy sleep promotes recovery nervous system, and that in turn is responsible for how strongly a person reacts to a particular situation. Poor sleep provokes a weakening of the nervous system, and that shattered emotional condition and, consequently, low stress resistance.
You should monitor the amount of vitamins in the body
Low stress resistance may also indicate the presence of a deficiency of B vitamins in the body. It will not be superfluous to visit a doctor and ask him to carry out the necessary procedures to determine whether this is really the case and, if necessary, choose a vitamin complex or a complex of wellness procedures.
These 8 tips can help a person learn to control himself and save not only peace of mind but also health and relationships with others.
Conflicts can arise everywhere, regardless of the people around you and the circumstances. An evil boss or unscrupulous subordinates, demanding parents or dishonest teachers, grandmothers at bus stops or angry people in public places. Even a conscientious neighbor and a dandelion grandmother can cause a big conflict. About how to get out of the conflict without suffering damage - moral and physical - and will be discussed in this article.
Can not imagine modern man that is not subject to stress. Accordingly, each of us is in such situations every day at work, at home, on the road, some sufferers even experience stress several times a day. And there are people who constantly live in a stressful state and do not even suspect it.
Life is a strange and complicated thing that can throw up dozens of troubles in one day. However, it is worth remembering: any trouble is a lesson that will definitely come in handy sometime in the future. If a person is an honest student, then he will remember the lecture the first time. In the event that the lesson was incomprehensible, life will confront him again and again. And many people take this literally, complicating their lives! But sometimes you should not endure some things, looking for life lessons in them! What specific situations should be stopped?
Everything seems dull and gray, close people annoy, work infuriates and there are thoughts that all life is heading downhill somewhere. In order to change your own life, it is not necessary to do something supernatural and complex. Sometimes the simplest and most accessible actions for everyone can significantly increase the level of energy and make you feel much better. Try to introduce 7 effective practices into your life that will dramatically change your life for the better.
Everyone who is engaged in self-development knows that he cannot do without a feeling of discomfort. Quite often, people confuse discomfort with a black streak in life and begin to complain, or even worse, try to avoid change. But as experience shows, only by going beyond the comfort, you can find and acquire all the benefits that we need.
Many people cannot imagine their day without one or more cups. And it turns out that drinking coffee is not only tasty, but also healthy! If you do not complain about serious health problems, then you can drink a few cups of this delicious drink without remorse and enjoy its benefits.
Conflicts can arise everywhere, regardless of the people around you and the circumstances. An evil boss or unscrupulous subordinates, demanding parents or dishonest teachers, grandmothers at bus stops or angry people in public places. Even a conscientious neighbor and a dandelion grandmother can cause a big conflict. About how to get out of the conflict without suffering damage - moral and physical - and will be discussed in this article.
It is impossible to imagine a modern person who is not subject to stress. Accordingly, each of us is in such situations every day at work, at home, on the road, some sufferers even experience stress several times a day. And there are people who constantly live in a stressful state and do not even suspect it.
Life is a strange and complicated thing that can throw up dozens of troubles in one day. However, it is worth remembering: any trouble is a lesson that will definitely come in handy sometime in the future. If a person is an honest student, then he will remember the lecture the first time. In the event that the lesson was incomprehensible, life will confront him again and again. And many people take this literally, complicating their lives! But sometimes you should not endure some things, looking for life lessons in them! What specific situations should be stopped?
Everything seems dull and gray, close people annoy, work infuriates and there are thoughts that all life is heading downhill somewhere. In order to change your own life, it is not necessary to do something supernatural and complex. Sometimes the simplest and most accessible actions for everyone can significantly increase the level of energy and make you feel much better. Try to introduce 7 effective practices into your life that will dramatically change your life for the better.
Everyone who is engaged in self-development knows that he cannot do without a feeling of discomfort. Quite often, people confuse discomfort with a black streak in life and begin to complain, or even worse, try to avoid change. But as experience shows, only by going beyond the comfort, you can find and acquire all the benefits that we need.
Many people cannot imagine their day without one or more cups. And it turns out that drinking coffee is not only tasty, but also healthy! If you do not complain about serious health problems, then you can drink a few cups of this delicious drink without remorse and enjoy its benefits.
Colleagues behind the back call you "time bomb"? The thing is that you swear and dissolve your hands for any reason. You do not want to push people away, but you do not know how to control yourself and explode even over trifles. It's time to learn self-control if you don't want to be left in splendid isolation!
Here are some ways to curb your anger:
Recognize the problem
Many people believe that their anger is not such a serious disadvantage. But he can get himself in trouble. Because of your character, you may lose your job or your family and friends. Of course, your loved ones know about your intemperance, but this does not mean at all that they will always put up with it.
So the first step is to admit to yourself that you don't know how to control yourself.
1. Recall all the situations when you flew off the coils. Was it someone's joke or a healthy discussion that turned into a heated argument?
2. Try to conduct an objective analysis. Very soon you will realize that you are overreacting to everything.
3. You will also see that you never really tried to control your anger and said the first thing that came to your mind.
Learn to restrain yourself
Now that you've identified the problem, it's time to fix it. Use the following tips.
amazing word
When you feel like you're about to explode, tell yourself, "Relax!" And repeat until you get the hang of it. This word acts as a built-in command that immediately calms the subconscious mind, which in turn calms the conscious mind.
picture perfect
Control anger with the right pictures. The reason for your dissatisfaction is external circumstances and expectations. When your hopes are dashed, you immediately lose your temper. All you have to do is close your eyes and imagine a clear white picture. It calms the nerves and neutralizes the emotions.
Deep breath
As soon as you feel the alarm bells ringing, take a deep breath. This will change the pictures in your head and thereby help you calm down.
Humor
Convert your anger into humor. Imagine people who annoy you in comical situations. Imagine that your chatty colleague is a monkey and your evil boss is a devil with horns. It will definitely make you smile! Just do not call them names out loud, otherwise you may lose your job.
Settling the problem
Assess the situation. If someone gets on your nerves, just walk away. Or drink a glass cold water. Cool down, try to politely explain your point of view. If he/she refuses to understand, do not try at all costs to prove your case. The main thing is that you know that you are right. So there is no point in worrying in vain.
Use the suggested tips to curb your anger and be happy!
And the behavior is not always successful, sometimes it happens to regret what was said or done in the heat of feelings. The most difficult thing is to control strong emotions, instincts, actions, which are based on the need to satisfy a basic or urgent need. How to control yourself? This must be learned. It is a skill that requires strong will and mental courage.
People break down, expressing their positive and negative feelings and experiences, committing rash acts, that is, they behave impulsively.
Impulsivity is the inability to resist a momentary impulse, desire. The opposite of impulsiveness is self-control or mental.
Self-control and self-regulation is the ability to control your thoughts, emotions and behavior.
Impulsivity is devoid of awareness, beyond the control of a person, self-control is the ability in most situations to remain sober, controlling one’s mental state by an effort of will, a person.
Will is the highest mental function that determines the ability to make conscious, balanced decisions and put them into practice. This ability is fundamental to self-control.
Will - psychological basis goal-setting, since the ability to determine for oneself depends on the individual life goals and reach them.
The will is poorly developed in children and immature personalities, so they often manifest themselves as weak-willed, undisciplined, cowardly, aggressive or too impulsive people. Also, people with physiological or organic lesions of the brain, psychopathology, and psychologically disadvantaged individuals cannot restrain themselves at all.
The ability to restrain oneself is genetically determined, but develops in the process of education and self-education. The ability to control oneself is a psychological skill.
The hardest thing is to contain aggression and resentment. No matter how much one wants, the tears themselves flow, cruel words break from the lips, ahead of thoughts. People cry, scream and use physical force in cases where they cannot control themselves at all.
It is more difficult for women to restrain themselves from crying when the most sensitive strings of the soul are affected. The fair sex is by nature touchy, vulnerable, emotional, sensitive.
It is harder for men to restrain anger, to remain calm when they want to “strike back”. Hormonally determined, male nature makes representatives of the strong half of humanity more aggressive and, at times, cruel.
Sometimes it is necessary to restrain not only negative, but also positive feelings. Their manifestation is not always socially approved and appropriate. For one reason or another, it happens to hide great joy, and sympathy, and love. It can be difficult to contain not only negative and positive, but also neutral emotions, such as curiosity.
Modern psychologists experimentally proved the hypothesis of a direct relationship between the ability to restrain oneself and success in life. So, people who do not know how to control and restrain thoughts and actions are more prone to stress, prone to addictions, and they also have more problems in their personal lives and at work.
The question of how to learn to control oneself is a question of improving the quality of life. That is why it will always be relevant.
How to control emotions
The word "emotion" in translation from Latin "shake". This is a truly amazing phenomenon and a mental process that is still little understood.
Emotions excite a person and express his subjective attitude to real, past and possible situations. In addition, they motivate to act, learn, learn new things, set goals.
How to restrain emotions if they are spontaneous and natural manifestations human nature? Do they need to be suppressed if they form attitudes towards themselves, others and the world?
Emotions in themselves do not harm the body, the degree of their intensity can be harmful. Too strong emotions, whether they are negative or positive - stress for the body. Prolonged strong emotions lead to mental and physiological diseases.
Despite the fact that the emotional nature of a person is not fully understood, research in this area confirms the ability of people to control emotions by willpower.
An emotionally stable person is not one who is completely devoid of the ability to feel and experience, but one who has learned to regulate his psycho-emotional state.
Some people, by virtue of temperament and character, are reserved and a little emotional, "cold", others are too sensitive and anxious. All people experience emotions, although they express them in different ways. Even the most restrained and always calm person can laugh uncontrollably or burst into tears if the stimulus for such emotions is strong enough.
Perhaps every person once wondered how to learn to restrain their emotions.
- Understanding the nature of emotions
Knowing and understanding the nature of emotions makes it easier to experience them. Analyzing the causes of strong experiences helps to understand them. The strength and tone of emotions is influenced by mental and physical state, past experiences and moods of people around.
Such a phenomenon as emotional contagion - a prime example that a strong emotion can arise because it is experienced by all the people around. For example, panic in the crowd spreads at lightning speed. The solution to the problem is very simple - to retire, to leave the society "infected" with emotion.
So in other cases, having learned the source or cause of emotions, you need to try to eliminate them.
A person may be annoyed because his head hurts, and relatives will conclude that he was angry or offended at them for no reason. Emotions must always be controlled!
- Physical Methods
Body position, posture, facial expressions and gestures not only express, but also contribute to the emergence of emotions. Smile and talk about good mood, and calls it; look into the eyes of the interlocutor brave people, therefore, in order to suppress fear, you need to look at your opponent; You can reduce the level of aggression by relaxing your shoulders, arms, jaw, and so on. By noticing and noting what emotion the body signals, you can regulate it.
The answer to the question of how to learn to control yourself lies in itself - learn to do it, in the literal sense. When a person seems to hug himself with his arms or connect them behind his back, he restrains emotional impulses. They say about a restrained person that he keeps himself in control, about an impulsive one that he dissolves his hands.
The best body posture to help exercise self-control is a calm, relaxed, but at the same time confident posture, that is, one that is comfortable to be in.
Athletes know how to control themselves. Physical exercise and exercises, endurance and help to express the accumulated negativity in a safe way. Do not forget about such an important physical method as rest and healthy sleep.
- Reformatting emotions, feelings and thoughts
- an important component of the ability to control emotions and feelings. Without faith that it will be possible to cope with oneself, it is unlikely to succeed.
To change negative experiences, first they need to be correctly labeled with a word, named, and then the desired positive emotion or state should be defined. When it becomes clear what to strive for, you need to try to convince yourself that this state already exists now, at the present moment. Self-hypnosis is one way to reformat a negative emotion.
- Humor is a great stress reliever.
And feelings are helped by the method of finding something funny or stupid in difficult situation. If you can't find anything funny, you can dream up. For example, if you have to listen to unfounded reproaches, imagine how the offender's nose lengthens or he himself decreases in size, and his voice becomes funny, like cartoon characters.
Self-dislike, inability to set goals, perfectionism, excessive self-criticism hinder psychological self-regulation. If such problems exist, you should try to get rid of them yourself or by contacting a psychologist for help.
Controlling behavior in stressful situations
The following sequence of actions will help to restrain yourself from committing rash acts:
- Do not break down and do not act spontaneously. By an effort of will, restrain the impulse, stop, say to yourself: “Stop! I own the emotion, not she owns me.
- Take a deep breath and mentally count to ten. Ten seconds is the time that is enough to restrain yourself and not say or not do too much.
- Look at situations from the other side. Ask yourself: “Is it really that important?”, “Will it be significant in an hour, a day, a year?”. Think about the possible consequences.
- Abstraction
The ability to switch, to be distracted from the irritant, helps to restrain. You can enter a resourceful state by imagining yourself in a calm place, in a pleasant and comfortable environment. Reading, drawing, music and any other action that does not affect the exciting situation will save you from rash acts and help you abstract.
- Adrenaline-burning breath
You need to breathe often and deeply, in three sets of three inhalations and exhalations, with breaks. Inhale through the nose, exhale through the mouth.
Many people often hold their breath in stressful situations, without noticing it, and practically stop breathing! However, it is very important and necessary - do not forget to breathe!
Breath is life. Improper breathing or holding it is harmful to health and psychological well-being. Even just thinking about breathing and continuing to breathe in Hard time, a person keeps himself in control, retains the ability to think and control emotions.
- Pain
Some people are helped to come to their senses by an action that causes pain: pinching themselves, slapping their legs, clenching their fists tightly, biting their lip or tongue lightly, and the like.
- Mirror
At a time when emotions are raging inside, go to the mirror and look at yourself. One can be amazed at how the face changes in anger, tears, and other vivid emotional manifestations. Most often, when looking in the mirror, a person is shocked by his facial expressions. Not wanting to look stupid and simply ugly encourages restraint.
People who know how to control themselves remember that any emotion is not an enemy, but an assistant, signaling changes taking place outside the human body.
Emotions help you understand yourself and navigate the situation. A person is able to control the intensity of emotions and his behavior by an effort of will, by reason.